Stepmother

I have never had anything against being a stepmother (I’ve been one twice), but it is a situation that can be hard. For me the positive part is that I have an extra “kid” in the house that I love. But the down-side is in my case is trying to avoid being too emotionally involved when his parents cannot get along and they put him in the middle of their disagreements. Sometimes my opinion is heard and sometimes I am not allowed to say anything. It is a roller coaster ride of emotions.

Many selfish divorced parents use their children as weapons to get back at the other parent. And I can just imagine how it is for the “kid” being torn between them and not allowed by one to be too happy when visiting the other. The parent(s) know all too well that he/she has the sharpest emotional weapon.

A friend told me that when the stepchild is older he will understand the whole situation and make his own choice. But I don’t want to wait that long, so many years will be lost, so much love missed. And who knows, for me as an abused child it took 30 years before I dared to break lose from my past. It hurts, too, that his little sister Olivia will miss so much from him; he is just such an awesome big brother.

Parents, your kid’s happiness should be the most important goal in your life, not revenge!